As soon as the decision is made to go natural, the first thing a woman does is start researching like mad! You want to know how to do it, what products to use, etc. Then of course your eyes are open to the ready available hair forums and websites about natural hair. As you read the content of these articles and conversations you begin to see things about the big chop, trimming, henna treatments, etc. It is a bombardment of information contrary to a lot of our beliefs at Pentecostals. So what do you do???
I have heard many varying opinions regarding this question. Allow me to share my personal experience.
I first got into truth the third week of August in 2009 on a Sunday night. I was new to natural hair. I had been transitioning for about 5 months at that time. Because I was having such a hard time with my hair, I had it in a sewn in weave. After the first service I took out my weave and decided to never wear them again. I felt bad that after church everyone thought my hair was so long.
I remember thinking that I didn't want to fake my hair length. I was blown away and inspired by the beautiful hair styles, elegant up-dos, curls, poofs, etc. I was determined to grow my hair out whatever it took!
A few weeks later. I decided to braid my hair with extensions. We are all programmed to automatically revert to (a) braids (b) kinky twists or (c) a sewn in weave to "grow" our hair. In went the braids...
After a week of itching, frizz and not being happy with fake hair. Out went the braids.
I later found out that my pastor is against any type of fake hair. So good job Kendra :) But then I had to learn to adapt to MY hair. I was in a rut because I wanted neat and well groomed hair. However, most black women only achieved that by straightening their hair which I didn't want to do all the time. In addition, I wanted my hair to grow so I knew I had to do protective styling.
So HOW did I learn to adapt and cope??
I have learned several things:
1. I cannot go to every website about natural hair.
I learned early on that many natural sites were more detrimental than helpful because there was so much pressure to cut, trim or "dust" my ends. *screeching halt* lol. So now, my only purpose for visiting a natural hair website, blog, forums etc is for informational purposes. I look for hair growth techniques, detangling techniques, product reviews, and such information. But I am not concerned with henna, cutting and trimming as well as finding a way to spend more time on my hair. I just need to basics to take care of my hair and provide information to all of you beautiful ladies. Be careful what websites you visit.
2. I will not get addicted to forums and websites.
In the beginning this was a snare for me. I spent hours upon hours on my hair. I am just recently learning that it doesn't take all of that!!! Hours upon hours wasted watching youtube videos, chatting on forums, reading natural hair journeys, etc. This is a huge problem! Natural hair becomes a time stealer and an obsession. That is not the will of God for His people. Again, I was very guilty of this for quite some time.
We should commit more time to the things of God than to anything else. Many of us have jobs, careers, full time school, children or perhaps all of the above. Lets be mindful about how much time we put into natural hair. I am the author of this blog and you will only see 2-4 posts every week from me. This is because my life doesn't revolve around the Internet and blogging anymore. I love you all to pieces but I do have lots of other things to do lol
3. I will not be concerned with the latest hairstyles.
I just want to reinterate that while we are in this world, we are not in this world. I don't want to look like everyone else. There are certain styles that I will do but that are many styles I will not do. I identify with the church of the living God, not with the world.( I will talk more about that on the next point). Again, be careful even how you do your hair. Here is why: you want people to look at you and SEE a difference. Everything about us is different. We dress different, we do our hair different, we talk different, we even walk different! The initial part of letting your light shine starts with your appearance.
4. I will not make my hair an idol.
It took me a while to come t the conclusion that I don't "identify" with the natural community. I identify with the church of the living God! This is what I have learned to identify with. Identity is everything! I am proud of my natural hair! But I have noticed that many naturals hold their hair in such a high esteem, spend hundrends of dollars on products, spend hours on forums, ALL that time wasted over hair? No my hair isn't my idol. It is my glory :) so yes I care about it but not to the extent that it is an idol. I had to learn to check myself and make sure I wasn't glorifying my hair more than God. Sounds extreme but it happens to many women. In essence, natural hair literally becomes a religion because it is a belief system!
I have read MANY naturals refer to their hair as their glory. We know this to be a true statement. However, their definition of glory is not our definition. We say our hair is our glory because this is what God calls it. What they are saying is that their hair is their god. An idol is: an inanimate or animate object/material that is worshipped or praised in the place of the only true and living God. Hair can become an idol! We walk a thin line and we must be mindful. There is a tactic of the enemy to take things God considers beautiful and taint them. When we have uncut hair, take time to care for it and allow it to grow, it is an act of worship. Yet when we come obsessed, we are worshipping the creation more than the creator. Our hair is not our god.
5. I found what worked for me.
I am working with my hair and learning my hair every day! It is exciting to me to have natural and healthy hair :) With that it is also exciting to have a good pentecostal look with my natural hair. It is part of our heritage! A part that I am proud of. There is a look that I can identify with as well as many others. Lets celebrate our heritage and be proud of our hair all at once :) A bun with rolls and pin curls is actually a protective style. Now I have adapted my hair to be protected, fully natural, healthy and it has a pentecostal look to it all at the same time!
I challenge you to embrace who you are and love it!
Frizzy hair, untamed hair, thick hair, thin hair, big coils, large coils, who cares, its ALL beautiful!!
Celebrating our heritage :)
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